CounselorBarb

Individual Counseling, Couples Counseling and Sex Therapy

How To Stop Arguing About Chores!

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Several studies suggest that women take on the majority of the workload in the home, even when both partners are working full-time. This is due to several factors:
  1. Women think they can “do it all”
  2. Women are often more particular than men about cleanliness
  3. Women think men are going to screw it up
  4. Women feel guilty if they don’t caretake their family
  5. Culturally, we never really got rid of the idea that women are homemakers

What are the results?

  1. Women are tired and resentful
  2. This often results in negative feelings towards their husbands
  3. Which then creates emotional and physical distance
  4. Which usually results in more arguing
  5. Which creates even more emotional and physical distance

What is the solution?

Empathy. Both partners need to make an effort to see things from their partner’s perspective and let go of being “right.” Men need to see that their women are stressed out, and women need to see that their men aren’t lazy, they just have different ways of doing things. Men need to step up, and women need to let go of control. (Some of these men run entire companies and women are afraid they will kill the baby or burn the house down.)
I realize this is easier said than done, so if you’re still struggling, make an appointment and I can help walk you through the process. Don’t hesitate- the earlier you come in, the easier it will be to address your issues.
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